Term one is almost over. I've been more tired and consequently, stressed, than I've ever been in my Sec 4 year. This is also why I've been blogging less.

Well, shall talk about something that made me slightly depressed today. Basically, I have somehow or another managed to get into the first round of both SRP and OAP. I've been feeling quite happy about it, of course, because I wanted to get into either of the programmes. But at the same time I realised that at least two of my classmates [who, in my opinion, are more knowledgeable, more passionate, and thus more deserving of the vacancies than I am] did not get into the programmes. I felt really really bad when I found out they didn't get in, although it wasn't really my fault. And I didn't know how to comfort them. I guess I just happened to be luckier than they, but even then it felt unfair, and I was part of the unfairness. >_<

Oh, and I heard about something else today. It made me wonder why exactly I'm struggling so hard to juggle my school work, CCA, txy, piano... so much that I come home at 8pm everyday and then spend most of my time at home trying to finish my tutorials without nodding off; I rush around all the time trying to fulfill all my so-called responsibilities until talking for a couple of hours with my family or with a friend on the phone becomes a luxury. Yes, I'm working to achieve my ambitions. But the most important things in my life are really my family and my friends, without whom I don't think I can be happy even if I had all the wealth and success in life. And here I am spending my youth working for something in the future while missing what I have today. Gah. It's quite sad when one happens to think of it this way.

But of course, ambitions are worth working for. But neither is talking and spending time with people a waste of time, although I may sometimes be driven to feel that way when I'm overloaded with work.

*sigh* On another note, I've been quite a grumpy and whiny person this term. Sorry for annoying everyone with my constant groaning over all kinds of trivial things. Thanks for tolerating me and being nice. ^^;; I will try to feel less tired and be not so full of complaints soon... I seem to need a lot of time to get used to life in JC.